If all crime was legal for 24 hours I wouldn’t murder I would probably steal a bunch of stuff and spray paint penises everywhere
June 2013
If you want proof that gun control works just look at the fact that in Australia people have now twice tried to assassinate the prime minister with sandwiches
They’re called eyebrows cause my eyes be browsing yo fine ass
iwillincendiotheheartoutofyou:
my blog has become this weird mixture of fandoms, feminism, cats and really fucking ridiculous jokes that nobody outside this website would find remotely amusing
When I was 16, I had a fake I.D. and decided to go to a gay bar by myself because some friends bailed on me. While there, an older gentleman bought me a drink. He wasn’t a creeper, and he definitely wasn’t unattractive. I accepted the drink and began talking to him. No big deal. As the hour progressed, I felt myself feeling strange. I mentioned that I felt like I had a headache, and this guy helped guide me out of the bar. As we were walking down the street, the thought of, ‘Oh god, he’s drugged me, I’m going to die’ came to my head. I tried to get away, but I was so drugged up that I could barely walk, let alone speak. It also didn’t help that I had really large ‘goth’ platform shoes because I was going through a phase. Anyway, this guy brought me to his suv and began undressing me. As a final act of defiance, I hit him over the head with my platform shoe. He then punched me, and I remember thinking, ‘Why don’t they ever give workshops to gay guys about being victims of rape too?’ While I was as careful as possible, I never saw the guy slip something in the drink. I even watched the bar tender make the drink. Anyway, I lied there completely paralyzed while this pervert was lubing up. I locked eyes with his for a moment, and that’s when it happened. A very large and angry drag queen opened the door of the vehicle and beat the shit out of my attempted rapist. She and her other drag friends helped dress and care for me while the police arrived. I was saved by a group of guardian drag queens. They were basically the modern day ‘angels from heaven.’
God bless drag queens.
I will always reblog this
Whenever drag queens are present, you best believe they will save the fuckin day.
Oh fuck yes.
If this isn’t on your blog I’m judging you.
drag queens are so baddass jfc
Drag queens ftw
Wow… Just, wow…
I just learned that Vin Diesel taught Judi Dench how to play Dungeons and Dragons and now she DMs for her grandchildren and I feel better about the world in general.
i’m going to survey and see if it’s true that a guys lips are the same color as the head of their penis
Elementary Season 2 Premiere: Thursday, September 26, 10pm!
Incidentally, that’s the day The Consulting 6-year-old becomes The Consulting 7-year-old… :D
the thing that really worked about harry, hermione, and ron was that they were all the uncomfortable third friend
hello 911 yes will graham is crying
i wish someone looked at me the way i look at pizza
oh but they do
“There are infinite numbers between 0 and 1. There’s .1 and .12 and .112 and an infinite collection of others. Of course, there is a bigger infinite set of numbers between 0 and 2, or between 0 and a million. Some infinities are bigger than other infinities. A writer we used to like taught us that. There are days, many of them, when I resent the size of my unbounded set. I want more numbers than I’m likely to get, and God, I want more numbers for Augustus Waters than he got. But, Gus, my love, I cannot tell you how thankful I am for our little infinity. I wouldn’t trade it for the world. You gave me a forever within the numbered days, and I’m grateful.”
—John Green, The Fault In Our Stars (via mallorylynn99)
castiel-in-a-sherlocked-tardis:
what do you call a mouse wearing a purple hat
fine fuck you guys yall re missing out on some quality humour
if this hits 1,000 notes ill say the answer
bwahahah XD
- Before I shower: I DON'T WANT TO SHOWER TOO LAZY FUCK SHOWERING WHO NEEDS TO BE CLEAN ANYWAYS I AM HOBO
- After I shower: OH SWEET GEESUS THIS FEELS SO GOOD SO SQUEAKY CLEAN MY BODY IS MY TEMPLE EXPELLIARMUS BACTERIA
just a reminder:
the Summer Solstice is June 21st - its the longest day of the year and when the sun is at its most powerful (the height of summer)
the Super Moon is June 23rd - its when the moon is closest to the Earth, more than any other time and is 5 times bigger than usual
don’t miss ‘em! ♡
“Don’t be afraid to be a fool. Remember, you cannot be both young and wise. Young people who pretend to be wise to the ways of the world are mostly just cynics. Cynicism masquerades as wisdom, but it is the farthest thing from it. Because cynics don’t learn anything. Because cynicism is a self-imposed blindness, a rejection of the world because we are afraid it will hurt us or disappoint us. Cynics always say no. But saying yes begins things. Saying yes is how things grow. Saying yes leads to knowledge. “Yes” is for young people. So for as long as you have the strength to, say yes.”
—Stephen Colbert (via seameetscliff)
what do will graham and sherlock holmes have in common
a deerstalker
why are blonde jokes so short?
so men can remember them
this took an unexpected turn
Not if you just asked for directions.
“It makes you feel purdy.”
—
Darren Criss on wearing eyeliner (x)
And when the woman translating his answer tried to say that it made him feel “beau” (handsome), he said “no no no, purdy”
(via hazelandglasz)